For those of you who live in Jersey or have lived there, these things may
come as no surprise. For those who haven't travelled there before,
Beware, Be Prepared and Be Afraid,,,, Be Very Afraid.
1. The morning rush hour is from 5 AM to NOON. The evening rush hour is
from NOON to 7 PM. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.<
2. The minimum acceptable speed on the turnpike is 85 mph. On the parkway
it's 105 or 110. Anything less is considered "Sissy.." (Just ask the
Governor of NJ)
3. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Jersey has its own
version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires go
second; However, in Monmouth and Burlington counties, SUV-driving,
cellphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
4. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, cursed
out, and possibly shot.
5. Never honk at anyone. EVER ! Seriously. It's another offense that
can get you shot.
6. Road construction is permanent and continuous in all of Jersey . Detour
barrels are moved around for your entertainment pleasure during the middle
of the night to make the next day's driving a bit more exciting.
7. MapQuest does NOT work here -- none of the roads are where they say
they are or go where they say they do and all the Turnpike EZ Pass lanes
are moved each night once again to make your ride more exciting.
8. If someone actually has their Turn Signal ON, wave them to the
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally
9. If you are in the left lane and only driving 70 in a 55-65mph zone,
you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off" accordingly.
If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
10. Do not try to estimate travel time -- just leave Monday afternoon for
Tuesday appointments, by noon Thursday for Friday appointments, and right
after church on Sunday for anything on Monday morning.
SAFE DRIVING ! ! !